Are You Out To Win?

I subscribe to a few different blogs of people I admire or enjoy. One recent blog post surprised me as it seemed out of character for this blogger. It was a bit like a brag about how busy he was and why it was making him a better person. He outlined minute by minute what he was doing one day. A few times the timeline included the statement that he was chatting with people while “picking off a few emails” or taking phone calls. He went on stating how full every minute was. Even when he was alone he was doing something – email, writing, etc.  He seemed exhausted by his life while also talking about how necessary it is to work like this because he’s “out to win.”

I had to pause and think about this. I am as guilty of multi-tasking as this blogger. I also know as a business owner I need to work hard and it requires a lot of my time. However, I truly believe it’s so important to have down time and to give people my full attention. I don’t mean any disrespect to this blogger, but how can you possibly “win” when you are not giving people the courtesy of your full attention; when you’re not even giving yourself the consideration of a few breathing moments. We rob ourselves of true connection when we aren’t present with others and ourselves.  And, I don’t care how busy you are or how much you want to “win”, it’s just not respectful to do something else while having a conversation with someone.

I believe winning is about having respectful, caring connections with people, taking time for ourselves and being present in our lives by fully experiencing each moment. And, yes, fully giving someone your attention even when you have much to do. Instead of being “out to win” be “out to build relationships” with others and yourself.  I guarantee you will win.

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Arden Clise is founder and president of Clise Etiquette. Her love for business etiquette began in previous jobs when she was frequently asked for etiquette, public speaking and business attire advice by executives and board members. The passion for etiquette took hold and compelled Arden to start a consulting business to help others. Read more >>

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